March 2011
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MacGruber: How’s your nose, rookie? Lt. Dixon Piper: It’s fine. I just banged it into a giant vagina. MacGruber: So, my face is a vagina, huh? Well, I bet you wish your nose was a dick… So you could fuck butts.
“I like when a woman has ambition. It’s like seeing a dog wearing clothes.”
– Jack Donaghy
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Tracey Jordan: Alright, Jack. What’s the plan? Jack Donaghy: One word; Surge. Tracey Jordan: THAT’S TWO WORDS!
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Jericho: what should i change my url to? Me: kingofnothing Me: swallowingprincesspeach Me: fivetenfifteen Me: summerfuck Me: artfag#8218 Me: anime4lyf Jericho: haha Me: keyboard+mouse=semen Me: rubberducky Me: rubberfucky Me: rubberchucky Me: hospitalnun Me: churchnurse Me: applepotpie Me: donaldduckdraper Me: dannyordonaldglover
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Everytime I see a tattoo that says "this too shall...
And I have seen many, it makes me want to get a tattoo of Gandalf with text beneath it saying “like fuck it will”.
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my bad bro..
twistedhypocrisy:
My house mate just came into my room and asked me if I knew what off milk smelt like? To which I responded, “ah yeah.” After smelling the milk I poured a small amount into a glass for a taste. It tasted fine at the time, but now I feel slightly ill. Kinda like if I’d swallowed bad milk.
Sorry buddy,
I POISONED THE MILK TO KILL YOU BOTH.
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jerichodl replied to your photo: Cooked a creamy pesto chicken pasta with baby…
Fuck you and your faggot housemate, I Doubled Down.
For those of you in the audience, what my other housemate is referring to is the fact that he did not join us in eating Pasta. He instead elected to eat a KFC burger known as the ‘Double Down’, in which the traditional bun is replaced with two deep...
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“The link for that last post says “cooked a creamy pesto chicken pasta with...”
– Rhiann
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“The more sex work is integrated into mainstream Australian society, the less...”
– i grow giant pumpkins - ”Sex workers are marginalised less by their clients than they are by anti-sex work legislation” (via indefensible)
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Tracy Jordan: Hey, did you hear the good news, J.D.? I’m Irish Catholic now, like you, Regis, and the Pope. Jack Donaghy: Oh, ho ho, no you’re not. The church already has enough lawsuits. Tracy Jordan: See, I can screw up now, and then just go to confession. No longer do I have to throw my parties in international waters. Jack Donaghy: That’s not how it works, Tracy. Even though...
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University.
This semester I’m studying four subjects; Linguistics (Language, culture and society), Philosophy (Philosophical problems)+(Critical Thinking) and also English (Literature; Introduction to the short story). I’m planning to double major in Philosophy and English.
So far it’s been fairly excellent. I’m both lucky and unlucky in the fact that I have no idea what I want to be...
“The only thing that sucks about you being a Catholic and me being an Atheist is...”
– Me, speaking to my girlfriend.
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Homophobic nerd makes a stupid comment on a game's... →
Tina Fey is too hot for most of the jokes in 30...
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Me: You hated me when I was trying to sleep before. Rhiann: I did. Me: You always do. Rhiann: Yeah, because you do this thing when you’re sleeping where you just leave me alone.
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Toofer (reading a dictionary): Oh! Here it is! “Izzle; A suffix that can be used to take the place of anything”. Tracey: Now you’re just being patronizzle.
Should I shave off my beard?
Yes or no.